graceful review

This book. It could have been written specifically for me. And in some ways, it was. This book is for the "good girl." It is about letting go of your try hard life. Letting go of the fear, the stress, the loneliness, the feeling of unworthiness or a need to always prove yourself and be acceptable to others. 

So if you can relate to any or all of those feelings, you may want to read this book too. (It is for teens and young women though, so if you feel you want an "older" version, there is Grace for the Good Girl.)

It is kind of ridiculous how many pages I marked but I didn't want to forget anything. Here are just some of the quotes that spoke to me and apparently others, because I found these on Google images.

Time for "Maddie getting rather personal and serious" so hold on....

So I have been awakened from my humdrum existence to the fact that God and Jesus Christ are a huge deal and I can't keep on as though they shouldn't be the center of my whole life. And changing the center of your whole life is really hard people. 

So I get a Bible. I read it. I start praying more often. I go to church weekly. I try to keep Him on my mind. But I still feel like I am not really getting it. So now what? What do I have to do? Someone give me a list. Tell me step by step what to do and I will do it! But...... it doesn't really work that way. And that's what Emily P. Freeman was addressing. 

"I said to myself, 'I am not perfect, so I'll try harder. Filled with determination and rules, I was ready to follow step-by-step to get life right, including my relationship with Jesus. I thought for sure I could figure it out if I tried hard enough, like algebra or skiing or driving. If praying to receive Jesus was the starting point and seeing him face-to-face was the end, I wasn't sure what to do in the middle. I prayed. I read my Bible. But what I did best was simply be good. I desperately wanted to experience life with Jesus, but I didn't know  how. I did what I could and hoped for the best."

After reading that quote I kind of just sat there. I mean, that is exactly how I felt and exactly what I was doing. How could she know? And what more did she know? (Cause I was assuming since she was writing this book she had that experience and I had a feeling that she came to that experience through a different channel than she was talking about here.) 

So I read on. And Every chapter she would talk about a different side of me. Some were more central to me than others, but I was all the girls she talked about in some way, whether little or big.

I was the Actress, the Girl Next Door, the Activist, the Heroine, the Bystander, the Judge, the Intellectual, the Dreamer. One second I'd feel like a punctured balloon because even the "good" things I was doing were wrong.... well not always wrong, but for the wrong reasons. 

In essence, I was doing all these good girl things to impress, to live up to, to prove myself. To achieve the expectations I thought God and people had for me and to lead to the acceptance of God the I absolutely .needed. 

Then she introduced me to the concept of Grace. Sure, I had heard of it before, but I really didn't get it. I thought I did, but I was wrong. (Not like that hasn't happened before.. ha)

No matter what I did, I couldn't earn God's grace and love and companionship. When I read this, I freaked out. A lot. WHAT?! But... but..... then what do I do?

And then she dropped a bombshell on me. Since I can't get it by myself, that is why Jesus helped me get it. Through God's grace, he sent his only son to die for me, the sins I should have died for. The pain I should have experienced. The hopelessness I should have felt. I sort of got that but then it was really explained to me. Through Grace, not through anything else, could I receive God's love and acceptance. 

That is kind of freeing and kind of scary,  because if I had steps and rules then I could get it myself. I could achieve, do good deeds, and still have some me time left, preserve some of myself. Realizing it is a gift, I could never repay Him for it. My whole life I must follow him, love him, serve him. No me time. No room for selfish wants and desires. And I am kind of becoming okay with that. 

I don't want to be a selfish human being. I really don't want to live for me. I don't want to be the heroine of the story. I am small, I am a very minor character in the story of Life. But I am loved, accepted, I am unique. 

If I get a failing grade on a science paper, I am not filled with self loathing, believing I have failed, I am stupid, I am no good. The end result is still, the same: I study harder for the next test. But the feelings, the driving force is different. 

I don't know about you, but all this was news to me. So I am working on it. I don't have a step by step list, I sort of have an outline, but mainly I just have a change of thinking and feeling. I have a change of center. 

I am not earning my redemption; I have received it and am trying to live it out.

I can't explain all the wonderfulness and graceful-ness of this book. If you relate to any of this at all, pick up a copy and read it. It is only 157 pages, it won't take too long. But it'll leave you with a lot to think about. 

Not exactly a review, is it? But I think I have told you generally what it was about, what to expect, and what I thought of it. 

Summer is so nice. I feel so unbelievably relaxed and happy.

  How is your summer? What do you think of the ideas I brought up about the book and living a life that is graceful?

Oh, and if you liked that, check out her blog. I think it is pretty great: http://www.chattingatthesky.com/

Happy Valentine's Day

Here are some funny Les Mis Valentine's I wanted to share. I found them on Pinterest!






Now for a more serious one...



Happy Valentine's Day everyone! I hope you all feel loved and appreciated. (And I wish you a nice amount of chocolates into the bargain.)

Thankful Thursday #2

It's Thursday again, which means it's time to be thankful! So, I have made a little list again of what I am especially thankful for at the moment....

• Warm beds. There is nothing like snuggling into a warm bed with a good book at the end of a long day. Fuzzy socks help too. :)
• Lotions. I have many lotions and potions. Many of the with scents; and when my skin gets cracked and chapped around this time of year, it is nice to have something to both smooth and soothe the skin.... while making you smell good. Wow I sound rather like an advertisement. Oh, well.

                              

• Friends. I am awfully thankful for my friends. Anytime I need help, even on something as simple as a math problem, they are there to help me out. And that's really nice to know.
• Quotes. I love quotes. It is amazing how someone you don't even know, someone from another place or even another time, can feel how you feel, and express it ever so much nicer than you ever could. The quotes that just get to you. And I love finding those. I am a major quote collector. I have them on my desktop, on my chalkboard, on my cork board, and in a notebook. Here are a few I have liked lately: "

"Once you face and understand your limitations, you can work with them, instead of having them work against you and get in your way, which is what they do if you ignore them, whether you realize it or not. And then you will find that, in many cases, your limitations can be your strengths." -The Tao of Pooh

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." -Philippians 4:13

                 

"What day is it?"asked Pooh. "It's Today!" squeaked Piglet. "My favorite day," said Pooh. -Winnie the Pooh 

"Have a heart that never hardens, and a temper that never tires, and a touch that never hurts." -Charles Dickens

"Humility is not thinking less of yourself, but thinking of yourself less." -C.S. Lewis

And, finally, "People are often unreasonable and self-centered: forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives: be kind anyway.

If you're successful, you'll win some false friends and some true enemies: succeed anyway.

If you're honest and frank, people may cheat you: but be honest anyway.

What you spend years building, someone can destroy overnight: build anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous: be happy anyway.

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow: do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough: give the world the best you've got anyway.

You see, in the final analysis, it's between you and God, it was never between you and them anyway."

-Mother Teresa 

Do you have a favorite quote(s)? I hope you have a lovely end of the week! 

Happy Belated Valentine's Day

I know it is not Valentine's Day, but I've been planning this post for awhile. And just because I was busy on Valentines Day making homemade cards and having dinner with my family, I will not spoil my own fun. So I have decided to do what I originally planned. I decided that there is nothing better than some wonderful, romantic quotes to make people happy. So, I picked some of my favorites. (Not all because that would be too many to count, dear readers!) so now, without further ado, some Valentine's Day quotes:

"A man in khaki was standing on the steps-a tall fellow, with dark eyes and hair, and a narrow white scar running across his brown cheek. Rilla stared at him foolishly for a moment. Who was it? She ought to know him-certainly there was something very familiar about him...'Rilla-my-Rilla,' he said. 'Ken,' gasped Rilla. Of course, it was Ken-but he looked so much older-he was so much changed-that scar-the lines about his eyes and lips-her thoughts went whirling helplessly. Ken took the uncertain hand he held out, and looked at her. The slim Rilla of four years ago had rounded out into symmetry. He had left a school girl, and he found a woman-a woman with wonderful eyes and a dented lip, and rose-bloom cheek- a woman altogether beautiful and desirable- the woman of his dreams. 'Is it Rilla-my-Rilla?' he asked, meaningly. Emotion shook Rilla from head to foot, Joy- happiness- sorrow- fear- every passion that had wrung her heart in those four long years seemed to surge up in her soul for a moment as the deeps of being were stirred. She tried to speak; at first voice would not come. Then- 'Yeth,'said Rilla." -From Rilla of Ingleside

And anyone who's read that book will be sighing right now, for Rilla saying "Yeth" meant something very special indeed. It is a rather long quote, but I just had to include all of it.

"It came clearly and suddenly on the air of a June evening. An old, old call-two higher notes and one long and soft and low. Emily Starr, dreaming at her window, heard it and stood up, her face suddenly gone white. Dreaming still -she must be! Teddy Kent was thousands of miles away, in the Orient- so much she knew from an item in a Montreal paper. Yes, she had dreamed it-imagined it. It came again. And Emily knew that Teddy was there, waiting for her in Lofty John's Bush.-calling to her across the years. She went down slowly-out-across the garden. Of course Teddy was there- under the firs. It seemed the most natural thing in the world that he should come to her there, in that old-world garden where the three lombardies still kept guard. Nothing was wanting to bridge the years. There was no gulf. HE put out his hands and drew her to him, with no conventional greeting. And spoke as if there were no years-no memories- between them. 'Don't tell me you can't love me- you can-you must- why, Emily-'his eyes had met the moonlit brilliance of hers for a moment-'you do.'" -From Emily's Quest
Oh what a romantic, romantic thing! The old call! I got a teddy bear for Valentine's Day two years ago and I named it Teddy Kent. I just loved this ending.

"I have a dream,' he (Gilbert) said slowly. 'I persist in dreaming it, although it has often seemed to me that it could never come true. I dream of  home with a hearth fire in it, a cat and a dog, the footsteps of friends-and you!'" - From Anne of the Island Ch. 41 "Love takes up the glass of time"

Anne of Green Gables is one of my favorites, and I just love this whole chapter! Oh Anne and Gilbert! Need I say more? ;)

"'But I've been thinking, Betsy. The Plan has been twisted about to let you in. You're in it now, that's all. I wouldn't like it without you. I wouldn't give a darn for my old Plan if you couldn't be in it.'"...... "After Commencement Day, the World!' Joe said. "With Betsy." - From Betsy and Joe 

Betsy and Joe are one of those wonderful high school couples. They meet the summer before freshman year, but have misunderstandings once school starts. For Freshman, Sophomore, and Junior year Betsy and Joe are caught in a tangle of misunderstandings, but liking each other through it all. Senior year crowns Betsy and Joe's happiness, and need I mention, my own. :)

"That's the rose you put in the birthday cake, and next week we'll have a fresh one in another jolly little cake which you'll make me; you left it on the floor of my den the night we talked there, and I've kept it ever since. There's love and romance for you!" -Tom Shaw, From An Old-fashioned Girl

I love Little Polly and Tom's relationship! It's a beautiful little love story. And the way he changes, and goes West, and makes himself a better man....! And Polly's sweet, unwavering love. It's a wonderful story, all in all.

And we can't forget Jane Austen!

“I cannot make speeches, Emma...If I loved you less, I might be able to talk about it more. But you know what I am. You hear nothing but truth from me. I have blamed you, and lectured you, and you have borne it as no other woman in England would have borne it.” -From Emma

 I simply love Mr. Knightley, with an "e." He is one of my favorite Austen heroes!

"“I come here with no expectations, only to profess, now that I am at liberty to do so, that my heart is and always will be yours.” - From Sense and Sensibility

That part makes me have a smile cry, you know, when you're smiling and you have happy tears in your eyes? It made Elinor cry too. (At least, in the '95 movie it did...)

“In vain have I struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you.” -From Pride and Prejudice

True, Mr. Darcy followed that up with, I know you are lower than me in rank, birth "et cetera, et cetera, et cetera;" but really, it's a wonderful sentiment.

That is all for now, I hope you all had a very happy Valentine's Day!